Deep Spirits

While vaccationing in Malta, we came across this game with lots of cards, each containing a question. The questions are moral dilemmas of some sort.
Possible answers are 'Yes', 'No', and 'It depends'.
If you choose 'It depends', then you have to explain what it depends on.
You can also provide an explaination for the Yes/No answer, but that is optional.

Here are a few dilemmas for you...

1. ou witness a car accident in which one party is clearly to blame. Do you stop and offer yourself as a witness even though you are late for an appointment?

2. idying up, you find an opened letter to your teenage son/daughter. Do you read it?

3. ou are smoking at a meeting. Someone is coughing and showing discomfort. Do you finish your cigarette?

4. ou are at a dinner party and hear a distinct CRACK as you settle into an antique chair. The hostess is in the kitchen. Will you later tell her what happened?

5. friend has a severe case of bad breath. Do you mention it?

6. ou and your mate expect loyalty and honesty from one another. One night, out of town, you have a fling. Do you tell?

7. friend's fiancé/e is flirting with you. Do you tell your friend?

Hi Sabina,

It is a very interesting list. I have my thoughts in all three directions( 'Yes', 'No', and 'It depends').
ou witness a car accident in which one party is clearly to blame. Do you stop and offer yourself as a witness even though you are late for an appointment?

It depends, if that would be necessary. Maybe there would have been already more than enough witnesses. I wouldn´t offer such a service if there is no need for that.
Appointment wouldn´t be the reason not to do something what I personally consider as a good or important thing to do. The only thing in this case which is important is the certainty about the all circumstances about the accident and how sure I am about them. I just remember a great move "Twelve angry men". Things could seem to be one way and not to be. I would follow my plexus and my heart in such situation and the very first reflex about my role in the whole event.

Mirjana
PS: When I read a list it didn´t seem to be a hard thing to do it. After answering and putting myself as really in the situation as I can, it turns not to be so easy. So, I shall turn back to give other answers... I need a little distance.

1. No, traffic accidents are generally pretty easy to tell who is at fault and therefore my "help" is not really needed.

2. It depends on my teenager and their general behavior...if they are "taking care of business" then no I wouldn't read it. If they are getting into all kinds of trouble and being a major "pain in the butt" then yes, I would probably read it.

3. Yes, I finish it.

4. Yes.

5. Definitely...and depending how much they are in my face with it will dictate the way I will say it.

6. Yes, of course.

7. This is a tough one...because I do not know in which way she would be "flirting"...I mean if she was rubbing up my leg with her bare foot... I would say "she was coming on to me!"... however, if she were just "overly-friendly" then I would probably tell my friend that "I could be mistaken... but...".

1. Yes, but only if someone was seriously injured or unconscious. Damaged cars don't need witnesses. Insurance companies pay!

2. Yes, if the letter was left there open, it wouldn't be something secret or very personal. Teenagers carefully hide what they don't want their parents to see.

3. I don't smoke. If I did, I would never smoke in a meeting.

4. No, it's the hostess's fault to leave a precious antique chair in her living room. Chairs break. Especially if someone is a bit heavier than usual! She should have known better!

5. Yes. My friend could be suffering from something serious, a stomach problem, for example. Or he/she must be eating all the wrong things, which may have bad results on his/her health.

6. No, if this was just ONE weak moment. This could ruin a really good relationship. Having to choose between the truth and hurting my partner's feelings for something stupid I did, I would choose not to say anything. However, if I felt that I could not be loyal to our relationship, I would choose to break up.

7. No. It would be enough to talk to her fiance!

Sabina wrote:...
2. idying up, you find an opened letter to your teenage son/daughter. Do you read it?

Normally I wouldn´t. But, if it would happen during a hard time that I know my son or daughter deal with a problematic life issues and we as family as well, I would . Of course that finding a letter open, as Ryan, pointed out, could be a sign that it is not important. But even if so, I wouldn´t read it under normal life circumstances, only during time when my whole attention is anyhow directed toward my son/daughter because of worries and problems present at the time.

Mirjana

Sabina wrote:
3. ou are smoking at a meeting. Someone is coughing and showing discomfort. Do you finish your cigarette?

Even during time when I used to smoke I would never smoke during the meeting. I would deffinitely stop smoking when noticing that people around me show discomfort.

Mirjana

1. I'd be required to stop (as a BLS First/Aid Responder) to 1st check to see if everyone is okay. Secondly, if I observed the accident, then by law, I am required to offer myself as a witness. And, I would do so.

2. I would read the letter.

3. If I were a smoker, and someone was coughing and showing a degree of discomfort. I would ask if my smoking was a bother to him/her. Perhaps, the individual just had a sip of coffee and it went down the wrong pipe, which might not be a result of the smoke. If smoking was the issue, then the cigarette would cease to exist.

4. Yes, I would tell her in private - pending that I'm the only witness to the "crack" of this antique chair. Now, if others were there and heard it too, then I'd probably turn red and laugh as a result of embarrassment. I'd politely excuse myself to scurry into the kitchen and tell her. Or, depending how comfortable I felt; along, with who all was at the dinner party (if they were friends') ... then, I'd tell her when she returned.

5. I would pull out mints from my purse. Take one for myself (as a visual) and kindly (with a big cheesy smile) offer one to my friend. If she refused, then I would grin and say, but "your breath will smell minty fresh". Of course, this would be if we were in a public setting. Privately, I would tell my friend the truth, but in a way that would hopefully not offend or hurt his/her feelings.

6. I'd never have a fling ... but, since this is a hypothetical question ... If I were the type of person to even entertain the idea of a "fling" in the first place ... then, it seems pointless to have a fling if one is going to disclose that bit of information, so in a hypothetical sense, I would not tell ... but then I would not have a fling in the first place.

7. Yes, I would tell my friend.

Thank you Holly for turning my attention back to this topic. I promissed to turn back and give my missing answers, but I forgot.

Sabina wrote:
4. ou are at a dinner party and hear a distinct CRACK as you settle into an antique chair. The hostess is in the kitchen. Will you later tell her what happened?

I would tell her immediatelly. Actually I used to have such an experience the time back when we used to live in France and I did it like this.

Sabina wrote:5. friend has a severe case of bad breath. Do you mention it?

This is not an easy one and depends how close is this friend to me. To my very close friend I think that I would find the way to tell it nicely so that she/he can do something about it. There is always a way to tell such things to those who are close to us. I hope for those who are less close to me to have really close friends who would do the same.

Sabina wrote:6. ou and your mate expect loyalty and honesty from one another. One night, out of town, you have a fling. Do you tell?

I think that I would tell it to him. I can not imagine how I could get along with myself if not telling it.

Sabina wrote:7. friend's fiancé/e is flirting with you. Do you tell your friend?

Yes, I do.


Mirjana

HGolightly wrote:6. I'd never have a fling ... but, since this is a hypothetical question ... If I were the type of person to even entertain the idea of a "fling" in the first place ... then, it seems pointless to have a fling if one is going to disclose that bit of information, so in a hypothetical sense, I would not tell ... but then I would not have a fling in the first place.

Holly,
Great answers, but number 6 made me laugh... "then, it seems pointless to have a fling if one is going to disclose that bit of information"
It kind of makes sense when you put it that way...

I'll have to give my answers as well.. I just asked the questions and never posted my answers for eternity.


Sabina

My pleasure Mirjana

Thank you, Sabina. I'm looking forward to reading yours

Love,
Holly