Temple Stewardship

By Agate

Temple Stewardship

Postby Agate » Thu Jul 22, 2010 6:16 pm

Last night I had a meltdown. The reason is irrelevant, but the fact is I indulged in a meltdown of epic proportions. Needless to say, those never end well.

With a bit of time between myself and the event, I can see some issues that need dealing with. I'm just not quite sure how to approach them.

The core issue is this: far as I may have come, the easiest way for me to handle emotional distress is to translate it into physical pain. Pain of the body is easy to understand; it has a finite beginning and end. Not so much with pain of the spirit. I was still in grade school when I discovered that causing one can relieve the other.

This has got to stop.

For most of my life, I have maintained a careful distance between my mind and body. The former had to be saved at all costs. The latter was usually the coin I paid with. Funny how a Healer can be so cavalier about her body being damaged...but it never really felt like it was mine. Most of the time I've seen my body as something to be dragged along but not really attended to. And when I was filled with pain but had no outlet, my body became the obvious target.

If I take a half-step away, I can feel sorry for it. Poor lump of flesh...I've cut it and beat it and burned it and starved it. But somehow all that was okay, because it's my body and I can do what I want to it.

The logic there is flawed and I know it. If nothing else, it's essentially the same logic used by my dad: "She's my kid and I can discipline her as I see fit." Trouble is that I'm more brutal to myself than he ever was.

This has got to stop. But I'm not sure how.

I've been working hard on reconnecting mind and body lately...now I begin to wonder if perhaps that was a bit premature. If I maintain the separation, I can shift my physical focus. If I twist myself just right, I can see my body as just another abuse victim. From that angle, I think I can give it the care it needs to heal and prosper. But to do that, I have to widen the space between mind and body that I've been working to close.

I wonder if that would work. To view this Temple of mine as belonging to someone else, someone who asked me to care for it in their absence. I'm good at healing (and Healing) abuse victims; I wonder if it would work to widen the separation and work on repairing the damages done to this one.

This Temple badly needs renovation and a thorough cleansing. Perhaps my best bet for now would be to take that sideways step, and view it from the outside. Perhaps I can better heal myself if I view my body as being held in trust for someone else...someone who would not approve of the way I've been treating it.

Either way, I've got to learn how to be an effective steward for this particular Temple.
Everyone's got a tale to tell,
I know I'm not the first, or last but somewhere in-between;
Not best but not the worst.
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Re: Temple Stewardship

Postby mirjana » Fri Jul 23, 2010 8:52 pm

Agate wrote:...

For most of my life, I have maintained a careful distance between my mind and body. The former had to be saved at all costs. The latter was usually the coin I paid with. Funny how a Healer can be so cavalier about her body being damaged...but it never really felt like it was mine. Most of the time I've seen my body as something to be dragged along but not really attended to. And when I was filled with pain but had no outlet, my body became the obvious target.

...


I am quite surprised as I cannot imagine how it is possible to maintain a distance between mind and body. If they are not supporting each other, none can be well. Of course, it is my experience and therefore I am not able to imagine another possibility.
And, synchronicity is one of magic of life, just today my husband has mentioned to me a strange case of a man who has proved exactly the opposite. According to all possible approval he has got, I thought that it might be interesting for you to watch these videos that are available free of charge.

http://www.livingatcause.com/miniseries/welcome-c
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Re: Temple Stewardship

Postby dermot » Fri Jul 23, 2010 9:44 pm

Awareness is key, and you have awareness Agate...so you can change it. You can change your behaviour and alter your thinking.
Pity those who dont see or understand what they do.

I think Mirjana is right, body and mind come as one......but you also must factor in Spirit...whatever you believe that to be.

Its possible also to over identify with the mind....and when we do that we normally end up suffering. There is an observer, a part of us outside of the confines of mind, which allows us to observe our own thoughts with detatchment.
Its possible to do this, and with practice to detatch from imprints of the mind which cause us to engage in circular thinking.
This is how we have an original thought, only when we let go of circular thinking.

Lots of people find meditation works in helping to still the mind. Either way...somehow you have to step off the carousel, and the only one who can do that is YOU.

Pain is inevitable.........Suffering is optional?
....the heart only whispers, be still and listen....
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Re: Temple Stewardship

Postby Sabina » Sat Jul 24, 2010 1:53 pm

Dear Agate,
Here is an earlier topic in regards to the mind, body and spirit: Human mind, soul and spirit

Mirjana and Dermot have both replied so nicely, I just wanted to add the above link as additional material on the subject.
I deeply believe in the connection between the mind and the body, as well as the importance of the already mentioned spirit.

My body is a cage
That keeps me from dancing with the one I love
But my mind holds the key
...
Set my spirit free




dermot wrote:Pain is inevitable.........Suffering is optional?

Dermot, that is such a good line. Can we include it with DS quotes? I love it!!
"Whether You believe you can, or you can't, you are right."
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Re: Temple Stewardship

Postby mirjana » Sat Jul 24, 2010 3:13 pm

Sabina wrote:...
dermot wrote:Pain is inevitable.........Suffering is optional?

Dermot, that is such a good line. Can we include it with DS quotes? I love it!!


Great suggestion Sabina. I agree [El]
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