Looking for answers

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Looking for answers

Postby sourplums » Mon Jul 18, 2011 4:59 am

I'm 20 years old and I have been searching through books and web pages for answers for a serious question.
I've considered myself to be agnostic for quite a while, and it has worked out well for me.

Very recently, I had an eye opening moment. I have been brushing up on absurdism and existentialism and one moment I started to believe that everything I believe in is a lie. I believe in the magic and spirituality of the world and the things in it. I believe in fate, destiny, and karma. I won't go too in depth as to what I believe since that isn't really the point, but basically, I believe in a lot of what I am seeing on this site. The point is is that at that moment, I began to feel that everything I believe in is a childish view point, similar to believing in Santa Claus.

Since that moment, I haven't been able to shake it, and I feel myself sinking deeper and deeper into depression. Usually, I can turn to the comforts of fate, but at this moment I can't because I feel that it would be childish and immature to continue believing in these things. I guess I feel like I'm an idiot, or naive, or stupid, or something, because I do not actively believe in existentialism, or because I am not an athiest. I feel like I am looked down upon as choosing to see only the beautiful in life, and not all the ugly truths.

I just need to know if being agnostic is a naive way of thinking. I'm sure there are plenty of agnostics on this site who will probably say "no, of course not" but I need some answers. I need to know that I can still continue being an intellectual and being "enlightened to the truth" and that the truth doesn't have to be discomforting "God is Dead" thoughts. Please guide me to reading material, authors, philosophers, thinkers, etc in which I can gain some sort of validity in my thoughts from.

I'm relatively new to this site and I'm looking for some like minded people as well, so feel free to email or IM me! j_nagy815@hotmail.com
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Re: Looking for answers

Postby ubermensch » Thu Jul 21, 2011 9:22 pm

Heres a few of my favorite philosophers/mystics . Edgar Cayce , Rudolf Steiner , Osho ,the Buddha , Pantanjali , G.I. Gurdjieff, Manly P. Hall , and Nietzsche . I believe Nietzsche has a spiritual quality missed by most who are just looking for affirmation of their atheistic beliefs. A few things I have learned is everything seems to be interconnected and every philosopher/mystic has something to offer , its just a matter of how much B.S. you are willing to sift through, and Ive noticed my spiritual journey is a very personal one , sharing it with others not on the path seems to take energy away from the experience , be careful how much you share. Lastly one thing Ive learned here is that the most simplest of exercises can be the most powerful. Good luck. subconscious-activities-&-mind-control-t902.html
The more I give to consciousness/awareness , the more consciousness gives to me . .... ....
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Re: Looking for answers

Postby Aimee » Sat Jul 23, 2011 8:08 am

If you are looking for answers in a book, I would like to suggest The Watercourse Way by Alan Watts... If you are in need of something to look AT, I would suggest nature... Looking at nature, really looking at it, observing it, always has a calming effect on me...

I was always depressed by our pond which sits in a prominent location just off our front porch where I love to sit... It is "dug" pond and relies on ground water and water coming down the slope behind the house... It is lovely in the spring and fall when we have plenty of rainfall, but in the dry seasons, like now, it dries up... I used to think it was so ugly with its edges of caked mud...

Now, however, I look at it and it reminds me of how things change... The wisdom of the caked mud surrounding the shrinking body of water tells me that a wetter season is coming and it will soon be full again... I just have to entertain my self by noticing the differences in it every day until it begins to rain again...

Hope this helps...

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Re: Looking for answers

Postby Rachel » Sun Jul 24, 2011 8:59 pm

I'm not sure whether anyone can tell another definitively that what they believe is right. What matters if its what YOU believe.

The best I can do is normalise what you're thinking - it's all part of the human condition.

Have you read 'Waiting for Godot'?
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Re: Looking for answers

Postby Sabina » Mon Jul 25, 2011 6:42 pm

Dear sourplums,

I don't think that being agnostic is naive in any way. By being agnostic you are basically open-minded to the world around you and all possibilities.
It doesn't mean that you can't keep a sharp mind and outlook, it is about open-mindedness.
Nothing wrong with that!

As for books, I would recommend reading Tolstoy's "Confession".
I think you will find many, if not all, answers to your questions in this book.
"Whether You believe you can, or you can't, you are right."
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Re: Looking for answers

Postby mirjana » Mon Jul 25, 2011 10:46 pm

I agree with Sabina that there is nothing wrong with open-mindedness.
I think that you have got interesting answers and book recommendations.
Additionally to that I recommend you to visit this section in DS: Agnosticism
There is an interview with Bertrand Russell in which he leaves his message to our descendants.
By the way, his books could be also interesting for you.
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