Discussion and mind and ego

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Discussion and mind and ego

Postby mirjana » Sat Dec 26, 2009 7:52 pm

There is a thought that every discussion stimulates mind and ego. If so, how then would be possible to communicate new ideas, share opinions about them contributing to the change on the personal and general level as well?
What do you think?

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Re: Discussion and mind and ego

Postby Heidi » Sun Dec 27, 2009 9:43 pm

Personal views are highly connected to one's mind, background and of course, ego.
However, there are people who are stuck to their ideas, while there are others who are willing to put their ego aside and take an opposing opinion into consideration.

As far as a forum is concerned, it doesn't matter if some participants are firm on their ideas, and do not even think of considering a different view as a possibility, what really matters is the exchange of views open to all members of the forum.
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Re: Discussion and mind and ego

Postby Sabina » Mon Dec 28, 2009 11:44 am

Heidi wrote:However, there are people who are stuck to their ideas, while there are others who are willing to put their ego aside and take an opposing opinion into consideration.


The big question, for me anyway, is whether it is possible to inspire or motivate someone who is stuck to their own idea into looking at it, this 'it' being any given topic, more freely, into opening up and truly considering an opposing viewpoint.
It is not that it is important to convince someone of one's opinion, but rather that the participants keeping an open mind makes for a more interesting discussion or dialogue, for everyone involved.
If a partipant is simply stubborn in maintaining a viewpoint, without even considering the opposing argument, then it makes the dialogue seem rather pointless. In that sense, what would be the correct approach in "fertilizing" the discussion?

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Re: Discussion and mind and ego

Postby Ryan » Mon Jan 04, 2010 11:19 pm

Sabina wrote:...it makes the dialogue seem rather pointless. In that sense, what would be the correct approach in "fertilizing" the discussion?


I have a problem with this one as well and have yet to come across a satisfying approach to the dilemma.

I have tried ignoring but then the discussion just seems to end as I believe that is the most popular approach. Therefore, when others see that an individual fails to listen as equally as they speak, the others simply avoid the topic altogether.

I have tried to "wear them down" to the point where they are the one's that just ignore after a bit, but that doesn't seem to work either. Maybe because by the time it happens, if it happens, no one else is really interested any longer or perhaps I then appear to be the "robot" that is incapable of adjusting to something outside my list of variable responses.

Anyway... I would love to find a solution to this predicament because I run into it quite often so I am completely open to suggestions...
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Re: Discussion and mind and ego

Postby mirjana » Tue Jan 05, 2010 11:17 am

Sabina wrote:...
If a partipant is simply stubborn in maintaining a viewpoint, without even considering the opposing argument, then it makes the dialogue seem rather pointless. In that sense, what would be the correct approach in "fertilizing" the discussion?

Sabina


If a participant is stubborn in maintaining a viewpoint, it doesn´t necessarily mean that the opposing argument was not considered. Maybe the person simply believes so much in the personal viewpoint and therefore stays stubborn.
And why not taking the opposing argument would be the sign of pointless dialogue? Doesn´t the other part who sees things that way appear too as stubborn in maintaining a personal viewpoint? Actually we are talking about two persons who each for self keeps the personal viewpoint, one is maintaining it by avoiding further discussion, and the other one by insisting in new explanations about the personal viewpoint which also shows the very same, stubbornness in maintaining personal viewpoint.
If I am one of the two, in order to fertilize discussion, and if I am sure that what I know or feel is of the importance for others, I would try to find new way to initiate interest and open some new door to understanding. Otherwise I would have been the same as the one who I criticized for shutting the door. Or if I would feel that my arguments are of the kind that can be accepted at the moment, and I am not able to find other arguments or capacity to express the same in the different way, I would stop, but not with a feeling that other part is guilty for not understanding me or not accepting my opinion.
Generally, we should not be pretentious when taking part in discussion, but only doing our best in order to explain personal approach. But, personal approach is only that, personal approach, nothing more. We never know if even those who seem to ignore our thoughts actually have taken some of them or have been influenced by what we have said. I say this because it happens to me too not to respond always and not immediately, but that what I have read or heard have influenced me. In the moment of influence heart always sends the message of gratitude and recognition, even if words are not used. If everything is energy, I want to believe that immediate reactions or words are not necessarily everything that estimates a person´s reaction and therefore it will not be my only criteria how I think about the person in dialogue.
I wouldn´t have expectations but would be open to things how they evolve.

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Re: Discussion and mind and ego

Postby Alvino » Wed Jan 20, 2010 7:07 am

Ryan: as I understand The Problem:
What is the solution if you are in a discussion = DYAD
and the other refuses to hear, listen to or Consider your
information/views...

Someone said IF YOU ARGUE WITH A FOOL then there
will be TWO FOOLS in the argument.

interpretation: The solution is to END your goal of convincing them
by some way or other - best way is to end your Unwise struggle
by BECOMING SILENT
on that topic or all further discussion with aN obstinate or closed mind.
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Re: Discussion and mind and ego

Postby mirjana » Wed Jan 20, 2010 9:07 pm

To Heidi
"As far as a forum is concerned, it doesn't matter if some participants are firm on their ideas, and do not even think of considering a different view as a possibility, what really matters is the exchange of views open to all members of the forum."

I like this point, Heidi, as I also think that "what really matters is the exchange of views open to all members of the forum."
Exchanging thoughts does not necessarily means to address directly anybody or to answer, except when one is personally asked. I see it like a chain of thoughts. The topic is an initial inspiration and each new post is a little additional contribution to the new chain of inspirations. Sometimes one answers directly and sometimes just to say how the chain of thoughts has inspired her/him personally to say something, which can eventually inspire others the same way.
The chain of thoughts is like it will be in the story Imagination exercise, which Sabina has just begun.

To Ryan

Ryan, do you mean by "they „ ,the other party in the discussion?
If, yes,then my answer will be:
Do not ignore, as this brings nothing to anyone. Do not wear anybody down too, as that will those, who you want to wear down, only make more persistent.
If you think that you have to say something that will contribute to the discussion, just do it your way and stay in it.

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